Puff Ball 01

Here’s the truth, I have no idea whatsoever why anyone would ever call me Puff Ball. I mean, I’m more of a lemon drop, but apparently, I have little say in the matter. I mean, the roomie and his goofy friends, right? They just do and say whatever they want.

“Hush roomie, your friend Sammy texted me and requested an outfit like this. I mean, I added the eyes and the hair, but he asked for it. Besides, I firmly buttoned up and tightly held in place and all, so.”

“Ugh, I don’t know what’s worse, Puff Ball. The fact that I know that “buttoned up tight” means that you’re wearing two pairs of undies or that fact that my friend Sammy is now submitting requests.”

“Well, it’s no more than window shopping for Sammy, that’s all. I mean he’s nice to me and we don’t do anything anyways, so what’s the big if he likes the way my thighs look in these type of leisure shorts?”

“Look Puff Ball, I don’t really want to talk about this, but it has been growing over time and you may not realize it, but there is some stuff being done between the two of you, not that I’m complaining about the distraction you have become so I can beat Sammy at one on one in the driveway.”

“And what’s the big deal if I like to gently brush my hands on his chest or his arms once in a while? I mean, it’s natural after a certain length of (flirting) time, right Dale?”

“Oh, well, roomie, let me ask you this Puff Ball, um, does Sammy have a big deal or not?”

Well, stupid roomie questions and all. Also, I don’t know if Sammy has a big deal or not. All I know is that he has a bulge like literally every guy on the planet. I mean, it looks like a large bulge, but jeans can be deceptive and I’m a fine example of that when I wear my double undies under mt Denim shorts, only in the other way. Also, LOL, maybe I do share a little too much with the roomie.

“Well, maybe we should talk about how you always have to help Ben’s mom “move” boxes around in her basement twice a month. I mean, is it a “big deal” on you when you’re moving her box all around on the same Saturday nights that her hubby just so happens to be playing cards with his buddies? I mean, we should talk about that big deal too then, roomie.”

“Oh, um, well, um, well, um.”

“LOL relax Dale, everybody but Ben’s knows all about how you flex your muscle for her box.”

“Oh, I mean, you mean everybody but Ben and Ben’s dad, right?”

“LOL, silly roomie, he uses you as his chance to participate in the boys club card game so he can feel better about, well, you know, it’s a boys club game and all, so.”

“Um, Puff Ball, I love the way you make me breakfast on the weekends and, hey wait a minute, how do know so much about this “boys club card game” and all?”

“Oh, oops, well, shoot, they need a safe server sometimes, but I never peeked in on them, so.”

Alright then, um, that was enough Saturday morning talk between Dale the roomie and myself, right?

“Ah, so Puff Ball, this is a tie then, right (he, he)?”

“It’s a tie, stud.”

Fist bump.

Roomie issues, right? Dale has them with me and I have them with him, yet we manage to live happy and free and I wouldn’t let him move out if he wanted to. I mean, Ben’s mom pays me to keep him close by and all, LOL.

Anyways, hey folks, I’m Paul, I’m Pauly and I’m Puff Ball, I guess. As I mentioned earlier, I maintain a well “buttoned and tight” appearance with my middle parts and that allows me to wear riskier clothes such as Denim and leisure shorts. I’m fairly “tight” myself and actually wished that my thighs were a erzurum escort little thicker than they are. There are a few T-Girls on Chang who really push the seams of the legs of their shorts and I really like that look, but I’m not about to start downing cheeseburgers for that. Um, I will wear my long hair down sometimes, but I like a ponytail too. And um, well, I tried to make one of those “introduction” videos for my Chang homepage like that little cutie Ariel created, but that was hard to match, so forget about searching for it. I mean, well, it’s no longer available on my page, so forget I even brought up such an embarrassing effort.

And apparently, that’s enough about me for now because the one-on-one game must be over and at halftime or something.

“Puff Ball, do you have an ice tea for me? And ah, wow, you wore it, so thanks babe.”

“Oh, hey Sammy and of course I have a cold ice tea for you. So, how’s the game going in the driveway and is my roomie breathing, barely breathing or down right huffing and puffing?”

“Oh, you know Puff Ball, we think we play at the NBA level, but the truth is that we can barely catch our breath. I mean, huff and puff, Puff Ball.”

“Peck kiss me for the ice tea and the short shorts????”

Oh, so sometimes it is “ask and you shall receive” then? Cool.

“Alright Puff Ball, get an ice tea and the portable defibrillator for your roomie and then tell me two things and make them both good.”

“Oh, um, one, if showers weren’t so dangerous for two people, then I might consider scrubbing your back someday (and I would keep my undies on) and two, I just keep the defibrillator in the breezeway these days. Your turn, Sammy.”

“One, if you ever want to be just you, I could probably handle things if you ever decide to be less “buttoned up and tight” under your shorts and two, whoa, what’s got you so worked up and frisky today, Puff Ball?”

“Um, I don’t know, but let’s call it “playful” and leave it at that and um, could you really handle something like that?”

“I mean, it’s just the human body and it’s parts and all, so no big deal, right Puff Ball?”

“Hah, you have a big deal and I felt it! I mean, um, well, maybe I will do that someday. So, peck kiss me good bye before you have to give Dale mouth to mouth?”

See? Ask and boom, smooch, smack, smooch, all with a touch of tongue.

“They sell safety strips for the shower floor, Puff Ball.”

Well, hells bells, right? I mean, I only called Plumber Bob because I knew him from the “boys club card game” that Ben’s dad had often hired me to serve at and all. Besides, he gave me a nice discount because his son had such a smaller plumber’s crack and because he liked my CD crack from my days of serving the grand ole boys club card games and all. Besides, his son Hank was closer to my age and all.

“All set, sexy server Puff Ball.”

“It’s just Puff Ball these days, Hank.”

“Um, I don’t mean to be too forward, but do always dress like this around your roomie? And his friends? And when is the next mixer? By the way?”

“Well, not always, but sometimes my roomie and his friends like to go to Hilda’s Hideaway and I have a connection with the hostess Rena Raye and Rena Raye likes it when my crew shows up all worked up, so.”

“Oh, flapping titties and nipples, huh? So, you’re the bench mark when it comes to having a roomie then, Puff Ball? And why don’t they call you Puff Doll? And when was the next mixer?”

“Well, they’re technically “swinging” titties and “pencil eraser nipples” but I suppose esat escort most guys don’t care about technicalities when it comes to titties slapping you up side of your face and all, right Hank?”

“Well, I didn’t mean to pry and I’ll leave you be, but um, these adhesive strips are not a save all, so.”

“I know, but I think the lightning bolt designs are cool and all, so.”

“I mean.”

“My life is full, Hank, but if you follow me on Chang and if you happen to throw Puff Doll out there, well.”

Huh, like father, like son, right?

“Hank, thanks for the lightning bolts and Hank, um, am I doing alright without titties to offer? I mean.”

“LOL, you have plenty to offer Puff Doll, so it’s no big deal.”

“Hah, you have a big deal, Hank! I mean, wait, I already used that one. Anyways, I’ll have Rena Raye add a chair to the table tonight if you care to have flip flopping titties all up in your face and all.”

“Well, let’s not forget about the eye poking pencil eraser nipples and all, but thanks, Puff Doll.”

LOL, guys and their flopping titties, right?

“Welcome home roomie, so listen, I’ve been in contact with Rena Raye and he will hold a nice table for you guys down at the strip club, alright?”

“I mean.”

“Oh please, this is no time to shy about your love of fat titties flopping all around and earning your tips. But listen, um, ah, I should have some condoms of my own, right Dale?”

“Ah, no, Puff Ball.”

“I mean, you know, just to have laying around and all. For their colorful packaging and all.”

“Ah, I repeat, no.”

“I mean.”

“You’re a tease and a flirt only, Puff Ball.”

“But, you know, they are like miniature frisbees and all, right? I mean, it’s no big deal, right roomie?”

“Hah, you’re thinking about Sammy’s big deal then! And you’re also dressed to challenge Sammy’s big deal for when he stops by and picks me up for the titty club.”

“Well.”

“Well, I’d rather you had safety strips attached to your shower floor and call you Puff Doll before I agree to, well, you’re an adult, Puff Ball, so.”

“Fine, so what do I ask for? Big deal size? I mean, for frisbee throwing purposes, of course.”

“Hey, I don’t peek in the restrooms (but big deal size will be fine).”

See? Good communication between roommate’s is a must.

“Excuse me, you looked perplexed, so can I help you?”

“(geez, she should work at Hilda’s Hideaway) well, I’m an adult and I should have some these laying around my house and all, you know, to toss around like little frisbees and stuff, so.”

“Oh, I see, um???”

“Puff Ball.”

“Alright Puff Ball, I’m Nina and we carry a few basic sizes. We have “that’s not much of a deal” and “do you call that a deal” and “now that’s a deal” and our most popular size “that’s a big deal and all”, so any ideas on which size of (he, he) frisbees you might need or want, Puff Ball?”

“Well, my friend keeps saying that things are no big deal, so.”

“Then that means your friend is a big deal and all, so.”

“Well, I’ll take those then, but they better be in colorful packaging and all.”

“Oh, it’s pretty colorful and all, so.”

“And why is your co-worker smirking at us like that, Nina?”

“Oh, he’s smirking at you Puff Ball. You’re ah, you’re his type. Anyways, have I made a sale? I mean, I’m trying to get out early tonight so I can participate in Amateur Night down at Hilda’s Hideaway.”

“Well, that’s where my roomie and his friends are going, so I’ll stack the voting deck in you favor esenler escort if I can, Nina. And the hostess is my friend, so.”

“Then I love you, Puff Doll. And all. Also, do you always step out dressed in such a skimpy manner or LOL, is this how your straight crew gets worked up for the strip club?”

“Well, well, I’m just a tease and all.”

“LOL, oh yes you are, Puff Baby. Anyways, tell your crew that my Amateur Night stage name is Nana.”

Best service ever at the pharmacy, right? Also, LOL, Nina will have new job as Nana soon enough.

“Ugh, we’re off to Hilda’s Hideaway, Puff Ball, so say your secret good bye to Sammy, ah, like over there or something.”

See? Having an understanding roomie is essential.

“Hey, Plumber Hank installed anti slip adhesive strips to my private shower floor this afternoon, so watch what you say to him, Sammy. And vote for Nana. She’s the best.”

“Alright, um, will you be awake when the club closes? And after the parking lot time? And after the trade off parking lot time, Puff Ball? Also, how will I know this Nana amateur?”

“Well, I was going to play a little frisbee to keep myself awake and Nana is quite full and they announce her name (idiot, but I know you like it when I talk about titties, so). Anyways, peck me and go the roomie gets all excited and all.”

And the night went on and on and on and just how many little frisbees can a person toss against the wall anyways? And how many parking lot affairs were there? In the club and then outside of the club and then a switch off trade or two, right?

“What do you mean you fucked Nina in the parking lot, Sammy?”

“Hey, I “accidently” fucked Nana in the dark parking lot, not some fine momma named Nina, so. And who told you anyways?”

“Nina texted me, you idiot!”

“Oh, so we’re cool then because I promise you Puff Ball, I screwed Nana and Nana only. Besides, I think your roomie tried to hook with this Nina chick you’re talking (he, he, but he was too drunk).”

Well, I suppose things and relationships and friendships come and go all of the time, right? I mean, I held firm to my pissed off position for the entire week.

“Ugh, what are you doing here? I’m still pissed off and stuff.”

“I know, but um, I didn’t know Puff Ball, so come on, take me to your shower and you can (pretend) to hate fuck me fem boy (who has a roomie who can’t control his booze).”

“What Nina?”

“Take me to your shower and (pretend) to hate fuck me and let’s get things back on track. Sammy never mentioned that he was your boyfriend and all, Puff Ball Baby (and is your fine ass roomie home, by the way?).”

“He’s not my boyfriend and he’s never been my boyfriend and you better watch what you offer because I can screw stuff and I have the empty colorful condom foils to prove it, Nina!”

“(Yeah, OK fem boy) scrub my back, Puff Doll.”

Stupid pharmacy workers with wide and round hips who sometimes participates in Amateur Night at stupid Hilda’s Hideaway stupid strip club! Who also has an amazing, yet stupid body in the shower!

“See, Puff Baby, that was nice, right?”

“Well, I penetrated you back there and all anyways.”

“(Yeah, OK, bun splitter) you’re the best Puff Baby Daddy. So, are we friends again?”

“Well, I have no choice because I just ruined you for all other men and all. And wet soapy water really suits your skin tone, by the way, Nina. Even though I ruined you for life.”

“(Yeah OK), you’re my hero, Puff, puff, I can’t get it up baby. So, kiss me and seal that we are still friends (and hook me up with your ooh la, la roomie because I picked the wrong guy before).”

Well, see, I have the power of both genders. I ruin guys and I ruin girls and that’s my story and I’m sticking to it and I still had Hank the Plumber’s Apprentice phone number.

End Puff Ball 01